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Lindsay Lohan Shows Up Late to Morgue; Officials Tell Train Wreck to Get Lost : Celebrity Gossips

Un. Believable. Lindsay Lohan was turned away from the L.A. County Morgue this morning after showing up late for community service. Way to go, girl!
The star, who was briefly cuffed and jailed yesterday, was supposed to be there at 8 a.m. At 7:40, her assistant called to say she'd be there in 10 minutes.
When did she roll up in her $80,000 Porsche? Not until 8:40.

Linds in court for the 29,391st time yesterday.

Her publicist claims she was late "due to a combination of not knowing the entrance to go through and confusion caused by media waiting for her arrival."
Always excuses with LiLo, and Assistant Chief Coroner Ed Winter thinks this story has more cracks than Lindsay's teeth, since she's been there before.
Winter just told reporters there's NO WAY Lindsay was confused about anything, given that his office provided step-by-step directions on where to go.
More likely, she was strung out on meth ... KIDDING. Well, probably. You never know.

Lindsay Lohan: Whacked From Gotti Biopic!

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Lindsay Lohan can't catch a break these days.
Despite rumors that she landed a role that could help resurrect her career, she was just "fired" as Victoria Gotti in Gotti: Three Generations.
LiLo wasn't officially on board, but was rumored to be starring in the biopic about John Gotti and his days running the Gambino crime family.

Doesn't look like this door is still ajar for Lindsay, either.

"I promise you Lindsay Lohan is not playing Victoria Gotti," producer Mark Fiore told E! News today. "Talks have stopped and we are done."
Fiore emphasized again that "We have no discussions with her."
Ouch! Apparently, the troubled star's management pushed for an offer that the producers COULD refuse. Quite easily, as it turned out ...

Lindsay Lohan to Dump Surname, Go By Just Lindsay

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Diddy. Madonna. Cher. Prince. Oprah. Beyonce.
Lindsay Lohan either fancies herself on par with these celebrities, or really hates her dad, or a combination of both, because she's gonna ditch the "Lohan."
"Lindsay is dropping the Lohan and just going by Lindsay," her mom Dina Lohan tells PopEater, and that's not all. "Plus, me and [younger daughter] Ali will be officially changing our last names back to my maiden name, Sullivan."

NO, LOHAN, JUST LINDSAY: Felon would also work ...

Lindsay had been thinking about dropping her surname for some time, Dina says, but at first thought that no one would recognize who "Lindsay" was.
It was only after the infamous Super Bowl E-trade ad referring to a baby as "that milkaholic Lindsay," that the actress knew she no longer needed it.
Ironically, she bitched, moaned and even sued over that, but whatever.
"So many of the top people in showbiz are known by one name. Look at Oprah and Beyonce. Now you can add Lindsay to that list," a family friend said.
More importantly, "It's a way for them all to just start over. No one in the family want anything to do with Lindsay's father [Michael Lohan] anymore."
MiLo has not yet commented, but he's got a lot on his plate. Like felony domestic violence charges. Dropping the Lohan might not be so bad, Linds ...

Lindsay Lohan to Be Charged, Arraigned Tomorrow

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Lindsay Lohan will be charged with a single count of felony grand theft in an L.A. court Wednesday, stemming from her recent necklace caper.
She will be arraigned at 1:30 p.m., in person.
Lindsay will be charged with stealing a $2,500 necklace from an L.A. jewelry store. If convicted, she could be sent to California State prison.

Lindsay enjoying life on the outside. [Photo: Pacific Coast News]

Lohan will not be handcuffed and paraded in front of cameras prior to arraignment, but will simply surrender to the court when she shows up tomorrow.
After Lindsay is arraigned, she will be taken to the basement of the courthouse where she will officially add to our gallery of celebrity mug shots. Awesome.
Presumably, she will be granted bail by the judge and post it on the spot. We've been over this enough times with Lohan that we're pretty confident by now.
Further developments will be chronicled right here as they happen.

Lindsay Lohan Accused of Battery in Rehab Melee, Claims Staff Member Attacked Her First

Another day, another absurd story from Betty Ford. Lindsay Lohan is a suspect in a criminal battery investigation after getting into a scuffle ... in rehab.
The Palm Desert Police Department is investigating the altercation, which occurred after Lindsay and her roommates went out to A BAR and came back.
Upon arriving at their sober house, the incident with a female staffer allegedly went down. Police were called after a "hand-to-hand battery" complaint.

NOT MY FAULT! There's always some excuse. [Photo: Pacific Coast News]

Cops came to Betty Ford after receiving the call and interviewed both the staffer - who "desired prosecution" - and the oft-troubled star herself.
It's unclear if this was related to Lohan's rager in rehab this month, but when police finish investigating, prosecutors will decide how to proceed.
Whether they file charges is anyone's guess, but she could be sent back to jail because she's still technically on probation until August 2011.

Lindsay Lohan Dodges Bullet, Sent Back to Rehab

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Lindsay Lohan dodged a major bullet this morning when Judge Elden Fox ordered her back to rehab until at least January 3, but spared her more jail time.
The troubled star is due back in court February 25, and will be subject to random drug testing in between her release from rehab until that court date.
If Lindsay does not test positive for drugs or alcohol, her sentence will be converted to unsupervised probation. So if she stays clean, problem solved.

THAT WAS CLOSE: Lindsay Lohan is headed back to Betty Ford, not jail.

The D.A., fed up with Lindsay's baloney, recommended she get 180 days in county jail. The judge could have sentenced her to a year if he deemed it necessary.
However, Fox was sympathetic to Lohan, but at the same time stern. "You are an addict. I hope you understand that," he said. Lindsay nodded in agreement.
"I don't want another train wreck," Fox warned. Asked if she was unclear on the matter, Linds tearfully responded, "No, your honor. I understand. Thank you."

Lindsay Lohan Promises "Mayhem" in '10

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Looks like troubled train wreck Lindsay Lohan wasn't resolving to put an end to her wild ways as she welcomed the arrival of 2010 on the posh island of St. Bart's.

In a New Year's tweet, Lohan wished her fans a "blessed new year," and said "Everyone get ready for more (but positive) LOHAN MAYHEM!!!" in the coming year.

We don't even want to know what that means.

In 2009, Linds battled estranged dad Michael, broke up with Samantha Ronson, became a complete fashion disaster, hooked up with lots of dudes and cried a lot.

If this year is anything like that, watch out!

MORE OF THE SAME: It's just a hunch, but somehow we imagine 2010 version of Lindsay Lohan will be a lot like the 2009 model. A very skinny, unhealthy model.

In a slightly quieter mood Saturday, the so-called actress and designer resolved "to stop letting the lucky few that have my heart, try2constantly tear me down."

Well then. That clears that up.

She continues: "2010 is about moving forward, not backwards. Leaving the bad (people, habbits, and negative energy behind) time to make changes-right!? :)"

Very well said, Lindsay. We couldn't agree more. But remember that old "habbits" (such as forgetting to put on pants or eat for weeks at a time) die hard.

Lindsay Lohan Pining For John Mayer?

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Is Lindsay Lohan finally moving on from Samantha Ronson? Last night at Butter in NYC, it seemed like her sights were set on none other than John Mayer.

The two were seen sharing a table and dancing at the nightclub. If John wants to make good on his wish to bang more girls, that's a good place to start!

Although there was no PDA, a source says LiLo seemed very interested in John Mayer. It's unclear if they discussed her dad's fake suicide Tweet threat.

"She would follow his every move," a source close to the starlet said. "He would dance with the waitresses and then come back. She was way into it."

John Mayer. Lindsay Lohan. It's pretty much inevitable.

Belvedere was the drink of choice for their table, but Lindsay, surprisingly passed on shots that were offered up. John, unsurprisingly, downed them.

So what happened at the end of the night?

LiLo and John were still partying together at 3 a.m., according to a source. No word on whether the douchebag left with the troubled actress or not.

John's camp is staying quiet on this possible toxic pairing, and with good reason. "No comment," they told E! when asked about the train wreck.

L.L., of course, already Twittered about their night together ...

Lohan

You heard it here first. John Mayer is a butter face. And a d-bab.

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